Daily Living
by ColdFusion180
Summary: Piotr tries to enjoy some peace and quiet while his teammates continue to torment Magneto.


**Daily Living**

Piotr sighed as he rinsed off his dish and loaded it into the dishwasher. He had been moving boxes all morning and had missed joining the others for lunch. Fortunately, Remy had set aside some food for him so he didn't have to make anything new. Piotr had a surprisingly uneventful lunch and was now taking care of cleaning up. _I should not have had so much sauerkraut, but something was needed to cover the taste of those bratwurst_, Piotr thought holding a hand over his stomach. _I know Pyro likes the cheese-filled kind but the marmalade-filled kind are too much._

Piotr finished loading the dishwasher with soap, started it and headed out of the kitchen. He decided to go find his sketch pad and draw for a while. He turned a corner and nearly tripped over Remy. "Whoa!"

"Oops, sorry _homme_," Remy apologized while kneeling on the floor. "You find the brats I left you?"

"Brats? Oh, the bratwurst. Yes, thank you for doing so," Piotr trailed off as he stared at the floor which was covered in lines of colored tape. Also spread throughout the hallway were several flags placed in orange traffic cones. "What are you doing?"

"Just getting ready for some fun," Remy grinned as he finished taping another line on the floor.

"Are you planning to play Acolyte Tag?" Piotr asked.

"Nope. But if we do I'll definitely tell you about it," Remy assured him. "I still have to get you back for that last game."

"I thought we agreed using water balloons in the Dissipating Zone was legal," Piotr protested.

"Yeah, but it forced me to skip sideways until I was hit by a deduction ball," Remy explained. "That reduced my score back to green-woozle so that by the time we called it quits I was dead last."

"I'm back!" Pyro came running up with his arms loaded with several pieces of equipment. "Hey Colossus! How ya doing? I got the brain buckets Gambit."

"Brain buckets?" Piotr blinked as Remy slipped on the hard hat Pyro handed him. "Why do you need…"

"Here's some safety glasses, mouth guards," Pyro continued handing Remy equipment. "…and diesel fuel."

"Diesel fuel?" Piotr stared at the five gallon container Pyro set down.

"Yep. You wanna join us?" Pyro asked.

"Uh, I do not think so," Piotr slowly backed away.

"You're loss," Pyro shrugged. "Hey, where'd my lighter go?"

"I do not want to know," Piotr gulped as he quickly walked away. He entered the recreation room and found his sketch book tucked into a chair. He picked it up, sat down and pulled out a pencil.

"Colossus," Magneto entered the room with a scowl on his face. "Did you to move all the crates from Storage Room Six to Storage Room Two?"

"Yes. I just finished," Piotr replied. "And I updated the inventory list with the new box numbers."

"Good. There are four new loads of crates in the Sphere Hangar. I want them moved into Storage Room Two by the end of the day," Magneto ordered.

"What?" Piotr protested. "I haven't had any free time at all today. Why am I always the one who is asked to move heavy boxes?"

"Because you're the one with super strength," Magneto rolled his eyes.

"So does Sabertooth," Piotr pointed out. "To a certain degree."

"Yes, but he's not as suited to it as you are," Magneto replied. "He can't control his violent tendencies very well. After ten minutes of moving crates he goes crazy and starts tearing them to splinters. Not to mention utterly destroying the crates' contents."

"Well what about getting a forklift so Remy or Pyro can move things?" Piotr asked.

"Are you insane?" Magneto asked. "Last time I ordered a piece of heavy machinery it took out four storage rooms, several walls and half my office!"

"That was you," Piotr reminded him. "With the steamroller."

"Well if Pyro had been the one driving it would have a heck of a lot worse," Magneto glared at him and continued to rant. "Every time I order that maniac to move crates he burns them to ashes to get out of doing it. He's destroyed enough scientific equipment to make Caltech look like a children's science fair. It's bad enough he goes in there and sets the crates on fire when he's bored!"

"Oh right, good point," Piotr agreed.

"And don't start with me on Gambit," Magneto groaned and started to pace around the room. "He can never resist breaking into the crates and fiddling around with what's in them. Which always results in more destruction and depleting the repair budget. The time he got into the industrial centrifuges was bad enough. The floor in Storage Room Five is **still** warped beyond repair! And I don't ever want another 'Hmmm, what does this do?' incident again!"

"That was pretty bad," Piotr admitted. "But the blood stains came out fairly easily and the fires didn't melt what remained of the walls too much."

"Only because most of the roof disintegrated and there was a total downpour that day!" Magneto snapped. "It's a miracle I was able to make repairs so quickly while half conscious and covered with third degree burns!"

"Do not forget the feathers," Piotr reminded him.

"How could I forget the feathers?!" Magneto threw up his hands. "Feathers were everywhere! And you fools didn't do a very good job cleaning up afterwards. I was picking feathers out of the Control Room for a month. Heck, I'm still finding feathers around here!

"Sorry to hear," Piotr replied a little sarcastically and sighed. "I suppose I could get back to work in a little bit."

"How did Gambit manage to smuggle all those feathers inside the base in the first base?" Magneto was lost in own little world. "Why would he want that many feathers anyway? Where would he have gotten them all? There aren't that many feathers in the state! He's nearly as nutty as Pyro! Oh, he may hide it behind that smooth, Cajun exterior but I know the truth! Both of them are slowly wearing away at any sanity I have left! If their madness could be tapped as an energy source or a weapon I'd achieve mutant superiority in a week! Hmmm, that's not a bad idea. But the problem is how to hook 'em up to a giant electro-magnetic amplifier or pulse cannon or…"

"Boss? Boss? I said I will start moving the boxes within the hour," Piotr interrupted.

"What? Oh, yeah right. Good," Magneto snapped out of his trance. "Just get it done. I've got some research and aspirin to work on." Magneto left the room muttering under his breath.

"Thank goodness," Piotr sighed. _I hate it when he goes on and on like that._ He flipped open his sketchbook to a fresh page and started to draw. _After this morning all I want is a calm and relaxing atmosphere to enjoy the little free time I'll have this afternoon._

BNNNNUURRKKNNUURRKKNNUURRKK!

"WAHOOOOOO!" Pyro whooped as he zoomed past the open door and rocketed down the hallway while riding on a jackhammer. "HAHAHAHAHA!"

"YEHAAAAAA!" Remy sped by on Pyro's heels also riding on a jackhammer. "PREPARE TO EAT MY DUST! YOU'LL NEVER BEAT ME!"

"THAT'S WHAT YOU THINK!" Pyro shouted.

CRASH!

"Oh no," Piotr moaned. "That has to be the craziest thing I have ever seen."

"_Odl-odl-la-eee-dee-dee-eee-odl-eee-o-ho-odl-eee_! _Odl-odl-la-eee-dee-dee-eee-odl-eee-o-ho-odl-eee_!" Sabertooth skipped by dressed in a traditional Bavarian _tracht_ outfit consisting of a pair of black leather dancing shoes, calf socks, lederhosen, suspenders, white shirt and _wanderhut_ hat complete with _gamsbart_. "I love yodeling! Don't you Tigger?" he asked the stuffed tiger in his arms who was also wearing a hat, lederhosen and suspenders.

"You bet I do!" 'Tigger' chirped happily.

"Of course I could be wrong," Piotr blinked at the bizarre sight.

"What is going on now…WHAT THE DEVIL?! VICTOR HAVE YOU BEEN INTO CATNIP AGAIN?!" Magneto was heard shouting in the distance. "STOP MAKING THAT INFERNAL NOISE! NO I DON'T WANT TO DANCE WITH YOU!"

BNNNNUURRKKNNUURRKKNNUURRKK!

"TALLY-HO!"

"BANZAI!"

SMASH!

CRUNCH!

"**AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!! MY FOOT!! YOU IDIOTS RAN OVER MY FOOT!! YOU'RE GONNA DIE!!**" Magneto screeched.

"RUN!" Remy shouted as he and Pyro ran for their lives past the open door again while being chased by flying jackhammers and a very furious Magneto.

"GET BACK HERE YOU LUNATICS!" Magneto screamed.

BOOM!

"_Odl-odl-eee-ay-oh!_" Sabertooth sang as he danced by the open door again in Magneto's wake.

"So much for having a calm and relaxing atmosphere," Piotr sighed and put a hand to his head.

**

* * *

Disclaimer: I do not own X-Men: Evolution.**


End file.
